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How To Become Better Friends With Someone – 9 More Ways to Show Your Friends You Love Them Suggested by Listeners Last month, we asked listeners to share creative ways to show affection in their platonic relationships. Any ideas? Ask friends how they’re really doing… and give them time.
We asked listeners to share ways they show affection in their platonic relationships. This is a follow-up to the Lifecut episode and story we published last month with psychologist and friendship expert Marissa Franco about the science of making and keeping friends. Simple acts of love show your friends you really care—and let them know your friendship is safe to invest in, she says.
How To Become Better Friends With Someone
Franco shared more than a dozen examples of how to show love to his friends (see photo below). And our audience had great ideas to add as well. Here’s a selection of their entries from their Instagram, Facebook and Twitter accounts – and their LifeKit inbox. These responses have been edited for length and clarity.
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Many of my friends are people who enjoy reading. I choose books that include poetry, short stories, novels or personal essays and send them to friends who read and think deeply about the work. This also applies to Rainer Maria Rilke.
Sometimes I add a handwritten note about the book and why I think they’ll like it. When they finish a book, I often ask them to donate it to a Little Free Library or give it to someone else who might enjoy it.
I feel so inspired and inspired when I find a book that someone has chosen for me. It expresses concern for my inner life and well-being. –
I have two dear friends who I have been close to since they were five years old, Mandi and Patricia. This year marks our 58th anniversary.
Making Good Friends
I try my best to travel to see them and their children. And they try their best to see me and my loved ones too. For example, when my daughter graduated, both Mandy and Patricia came to her graduation ceremony, which involved a lot of driving. Someone commented that she didn’t have a friend who would have traveled so many miles for her, let alone her child. –
My best friend and I go back over ten years. She only gave me little cat shoes – just because I love cats.
It is valuable to tell our friends, colleagues or family what we have learned from them. It could be a skill like cooking, listening, or how to be a better friend. This process tells the people in our lives that we hear them – and that what they have to say is important. –
I follow up on things they share with me (which means writing a reminder to myself). This means I read books, articles, and links they recommend, or listen to podcasts they send me. –
Young Individuals Choosing To Be Friends First Before Dating Someone: Study
I send mail to my friends to show my love and appreciation – and not just on birthdays or holidays. It could be a handmade card or postcard that I picked up on my travels or found at a thrift store. Sometimes I share a meaningful quote or just a few words to let my friends know that they are in my thoughts. I believe this type of mail makes the recipient feel important and special – and adds an unexpected sparkle to the day. –
My friend offered to come and have tea at the residential care center where my parents had recently moved. It’s not a pleasant place to visit, but I have to spend a lot of time there and I usually leave sad and disappointed.
For this reason, I was very touched by his offer to spend time with my parents, who were very happy to have him come. No one else in my life has given me such peace. I look back on the visit every day with a deep sense of gratitude. –
I feel loved when someone takes the time to eat a packed lunch with me, go for a walk or have a drink after work – nothing fancy, nothing that requires hours and hours of commitment or lots of money. (although it is good sometimes). –
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My best friend and I live far apart, so we rely on texts, postcards, and random gifts to express our love for each other.
To really maintain closeness [in a long-distance friendship], I’ve learned that you need to be open about your life and ask them about it. And sometimes you have to be direct, because I think we all shy away from dumping too much on friends, or focusing on the positive.
? How is your heart, mind and soul? Especially as you get older, life gets so full and complicated that we get used to carrying a certain amount of “heart burden” – and we don’t always think to share it, here. Even with your closest friends. But it’s still nice when a friend asks, and it’s still nice to share the load with him for a while. – Making friends in childhood can be as simple as sharing toys or deciding that we are suddenly ‘best friends’. But the older we get, the easier it gets and the more friendships change. It’s probably been a while since many of us have had to put ourselves out there. We can feel out of practice and at least a little confused about what to say to someone we want to get to know better (Do we sound creepy? Frustrated. ? Weird?). While there’s no one right way to make new friends as an adult, here are six icebreakers that can help.
Friendships are often rooted in a basic similarity, whether it’s a shared interest, hobby or sense of humor. That’s why identifying something you have in common is a great way to approach someone you want to befriend. Commenting on your shared love of camping, sushi, or rap music shows that you care and are interested in the other person. Plus, if you have something in common, you can more easily pave the way for future projects (“I’ve been dying to try a new hiking trail! Do you want to check it out together?” or “If you want to go, there’s a great sushi restaurant nearby. The key is not to force it. Don’t overdo it and try to be someone you’re not alone in order to have something in common. Just the two of you. will feel more comfortable, but it will also help you look authentic and increase your chances of connecting.
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We often think that to win people over we have to be impressive: we have to have interesting things to say, be knowledgeable about the subject, or be funny and entertaining. But the secret to winning friends and making connections is actually the opposite: make the other person feel like they want something.
Are impressive and they will like you. People love to talk about themselves. They are just facts. So focus on other people and genuinely care about what they have to say. Come up with thoughtful, open-ended questions (forget boring small talk).
If it’s a brand new friendship or you’ve just met, ask for a restaurant recommendation, a new exercise class, or the best cafe in the area to work out. If it’s someone you know a little, focus on getting to know them better rather than expressing your opinion or talking about yourself. For example, if they’re talking about balancing a career and a side hustle, ask them how hard it is or what they’re most excited about, instead of That you jump into your experience. Asking questions shows that you are interested in the other person’s opinion, and if you feel comfortable opening up, they will want to develop a relationship with you.
Compliments from strangers or people we don’t know well. Because they are unpredictable, they can be appreciated even more. A compliment from a potential new friend can be memorable enough to start a strong bond. It may seem easy to praise external things, like appearance or style, but if you feel like it, make it a little more personal. Compliment their work ethic, creativity or great laugh. These kind of sincere compliments are what stick with us. Plus, getting past the surface (“Nice top!”) can make people feel seen and heard in a way that genuinely fosters connection and camaraderie. There is no need to go too far and base the whole conversation on different definitions. A thoughtful compliment will be much more sincere and will lay the foundation for the conversation that follows.
Ask Yourself This Before Staying Friends With An Ex
An important thing that distinguishes good friends from ordinary acquaintances is emotional, practical and social support. That’s why you let someone in.
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